Child Embarrassed About a Lisp? What Research Says and How to Help

The short answer: take it seriously, but don't panic

Your child's embarrassment is responding to something real. In a US study of 348 fourth and sixth graders, children who watched videotaped peers rated the ones with mild speech errors (/r/ errors, or /s/ and /z/ errors) more negatively than peers without errors on speaking ability, as a peer, and on what they would be like as teenagers.²

Even young children show this pattern. In a recent study, 4- to 6-year-olds preferred talkers without speech sound errors when choosing a friend, and a speaker was less likely to be picked as a friend as their errors became more severe.³

But being noticed is not the same as being harmed. These studies measure how other children judge a speaker, not how the child with the speech difference feels about themselves, and we found no study that measured self-esteem in children with lisps. In a survey of parents of children with residual speech errors, how much the errors affected a child varied widely from child to child.^2,3,1

What helps most right away comes from general bullying guidance rather than speech research: listen, tell your child that teasing is not their fault, and work out a plan together.¹²

What research says about lisps, peers and wellbeing

The main study of school-age children's attitudes we found is Crowe Hall's 1991 study of fourth and sixth graders, which included a boy and a girl with /s/ and /z/ errors alongside error-free speakers and speakers with /r/ errors. A later research team summarizing that study notes that boys with speech errors were judged more harshly than girls with errors, and that boys watching tended to be more negative than girls watching.^2,1

A 2009 systematic review linked childhood speech impairment with restrictions in friendships and peer relationships, in relationships with parents and siblings, and in school education. These are possible associations, not proof that speech differences cause the problems, and the review covered speech impairment in general, not lisps specifically.⁴

The closest look at everyday impact comes from a survey of 91 parents of children aged about 5½ to 15¾ who were in treatment for /r/ errors, not S or Z. Of 11 impact items, the one that best tracked overall impact was “My child's speech has an impact on his/her social interactions,” followed by life satisfaction and then being teased or bullied; academic impact ranked sixth.¹

In the same survey, children aged 8 and over had significantly higher overall impact scores than younger children, while boys and girls did not differ. The authors caution that these were families seeking treatment, so they may not represent all children.¹

An analysis of the US National Survey of Children's Health summarizes earlier research as showing that children with speech-language disorders are more likely than their peers to have lower socioemotional functioning, including being teased and bullied, and says the link likely grows stronger as the disorder becomes more severe. We found no study reporting how often children with a lisp specifically are teased, so be wary of any lisp bullying percentage you see quoted.⁹

How strong is this evidence?

Honestly, it's limited. The main classroom study dates from 1991, and the studies of lisps specifically used adult speakers and adult listeners in the 1970s, including a simulated lateral lisp that drew adverse attention from college students. They show how listeners reacted to recordings decades ago, not what your child's classroom is like today, and they are not a reason any child must change how they talk.^2,5,6

The findings also disagree in places. Among 4- to 6-year-olds, older children had stronger preferences for typical speech, while a study of 7- to 12-year-olds' attitudes toward children with cleft palate speech found younger listeners tended to be more negative. Crowe Hall's study suggested boys are judged more harshly, but the parent survey found no difference in impact between boys and girls, so treat both questions as unsettled.^3,8,2,1

How to talk with your child about their lisp, by age

No study has tested what to say to a child about a lisp, so the ideas below adapt general bullying guidance, which recommends checking in often, listening, and keeping communication open so children find it easier to tell you when something happens. Treat the example words as starting points, not a script.^13,11

Ages 6–7: keep it short and matter-of-fact

In a review of US studies, /s/ and /z/ were acquired by 4;0–4;11 at the 90% criterion, and the whole fricative family, which also includes the later “th” sounds, by 6;11, so a 6- or 7-year-old who still lisps is already past the typical age for S and Z. Children this age may notice how their friends talk: even 4- to 6-year-olds show preferences about peers' speech, and in that study the preferences were stronger in the older children.^10,3

• Follow their lead: if they mention it, answer simply, for example “S is a tricky sound, and you're still working on it.”
• Name the feeling before anything else: “That sounded like it made you feel embarrassed.”
• Don't correct their speech in the middle of a conversation about feelings.
• Point out what they're good at that has nothing to do with talking.

Ages 8–10: ask open questions and plan together

By fourth grade, peer judgments about speech are clearly measurable, and in the /r/ parent survey, impact was rated higher for children 8 and over than for younger children.^2,1

• Ask rather than assume: “Are there times at school when talking feels hard?”
• Be honest and kind: “You do say S a bit differently. That's not something wrong with you.”
• Work out together which situations feel hardest, and what might make one of them easier.
• Never tell them to just ignore teasing.

Ages 11–12: give them more control

The fourth and sixth graders in Crowe Hall's study judged peers with speech errors more negatively, including how they expected those peers to be as teenagers. StopBullying.gov advises asking a child what can be done to make them feel safe, which fits preteens who usually want a say in who knows and what happens.^2,12

Lisps can attract stereotypes: in one small study, 25 undergraduate listeners judged a man who dentalized or devoiced his /z/ as sounding more “gay”. If teasing turns to slurs about gender or sexuality, raise it with the school as possible harassment, and check what your state's anti-bullying law requires.^7,11

• Ask before you talk to a teacher, and agree on what you'll say.
• Respect their privacy about speech practice and any appointments.
• Make it clear that teasing says something about the teaser, not about them.

If your child is teased: what to do at home and with the school

US government guidance on bullying is clear on the first steps: listen and focus on your child, tell them it is not their fault, and never tell them to ignore it or to fight back physically.¹²

At home

1. 1Listen without trying to fix anything yet.
2. 2Say clearly: “This is not your fault, and I'm going to help.”
3. 3Ask what would help them feel safe, and whether they want the teacher told.
4. 4Practice responses together: saying “stop” directly and confidently, walking away, and telling an adult.
5. 5Make time for activities your child loves.

Federal guidance for parents suggests discussing and practicing responses such as saying “stop” directly and confidently, walking away, and getting help from an adult, and US Department of Defense schools suggest role-playing bullying scenarios with your child. Activities a child loves can boost confidence, help them make friends, and protect them from bullying.^14,15,13

With the school

Resist the urge to contact the other child's parents; official guidance says it may make matters worse and that school officials can act as mediators. Start with the teacher, and go to the principal if no action is taken.^12,15

Work out a plan with the school and keep following up, because bullying may not stop overnight. The law does not allow school staff to discuss discipline given to another child, and your child shouldn't be singled out or forced to change classes or bus routes.¹²

• Keep a short note of dates and what happened; this is a practical habit, not something the guidance requires.
• Look up your state's anti-bullying law or policy.
• Agree with your child beforehand on what you will and won't share.

You can also ask about school speech-language services if S or Z errors are still present. One research team argued that grades alone shouldn't decide whether speech errors matter, because academic impact was only a moderate indicator of overall impact in their survey; eligibility rules vary, so ask your school how they apply.¹

• Lisp at school: working with teachers and school SLPs

Keeping speech practice light

There's no evidence that practicing S and Z repairs a child's confidence, and speech errors that last past early childhood can continue even after months or years of intervention. Confidence comes from many places, and bullying guidance names activities a child enjoys as one of them.^1,13

Speech-language pathologists organize practice in different ways, from intense work on one or two sounds at a time to working on several in a session or cycling through them, so if your child sees an SLP, follow their plan for how often and how long to practice.¹⁶

Household suggestions (sensible, but not research-tested)

• Keep sessions short and end while it still feels easy.
• Practice in private, never in front of siblings or friends.
• Let your child choose when, and sometimes which words.
• Keep practice time separate from everyday conversation; don't correct them at dinner or in public.
• Never start practice right after they've been teased.
• If they're upset or tired, skip it and try another day.

• Lisp exercises you can do at home
• Lisp in children: the patterns and when to check

When worry or avoidance needs more support

Signs to watch for

StopBullying.gov advises talking with your child about any behavioral or emotional changes, and notes that children often don't ask for help.¹¹

• Changes in mood or sleep
• Not wanting to go to school
• Pulling away from friends or activities they used to enjoy
• Avoiding speaking, reading aloud, or certain words
• Saying things like “I hate how I talk” again and again

If your child finds it hard to talk about, consider a school counselor, social worker or other mental-health professional. If your child is at immediate risk of harming themselves or someone else, get help right away, for example by calling your local emergency number.^11,12

Getting the speech itself checked

Most children with early speech errors sound typical by 8 to 9. Errors that last past that age are called residual speech errors, and they can continue even after months or years of intervention. Since US studies put /s/ and /z/ at 4;0–4;11 and all fricatives at 6;11 (90% criterion), S or Z errors still present anywhere in the 6–12 range are worth having a licensed speech-language pathologist look at.^1,10

• Find a licensed speech-language pathologist

Frequently asked questions

References

16 sources from authoritative bodies. Last reviewed October 2026.

1. 1.Peer-reviewedHitchcock, Harel & McAllister Byun — Social, Emotional, and Academic Impact of Residual Speech Errors in School-Age Children: A Survey Study — Peer-reviewed parent survey (Seminars in Speech and Language), 2015.
2. 2.Peer-reviewedCrowe Hall — Attitudes of Fourth and Sixth Graders Toward Peers With Mild Articulation Disorders — Peer-reviewed study, 1991.
3. 3.Peer-reviewedHenry & Bent — Let's Be Friends: Peer Perceptions of Disordered Speech in Preschool and Early School-Aged Children — Peer-reviewed study (AJSLP), 2026.
4. 4.Peer-reviewedMcCormack, McLeod, McAllister & Harrison — A systematic review of the association between childhood speech impairment and participation across the lifespan — Systematic review (International Journal of Speech-Language Pathology), 2009.
5. 5.Peer-reviewedMowrer, Wahl & Doolan — Effect of Lisping on Audience Evaluation of Male Speakers — Peer-reviewed study, 1978.
6. 6.Peer-reviewedSilverman — Listeners' impressions of speakers with lateral lisps — Peer-reviewed study, 1976.
7. 7.Peer-reviewedHuff, Phillips, Dancer & Davis — Effects of Dentalization and Devoicing of the /Z/ Phoneme on Listeners' Judgment of a Speaker's Sexual Orientation — Peer-reviewed study, 2003.
8. 8.Peer-reviewedBettens et al. — Peer attitudes toward children with cleft (lip and) palate related to speech intelligibility, hypernasality and articulation — Peer-reviewed study (Journal of Communication Disorders), 2020.
9. 9.Peer-reviewedFoster, Choo & Smith — Speech-language disorder severity, academic success, and socioemotional functioning among multilingual and English children in the United States: The National Survey of Children's Health — Peer-reviewed analysis of a national survey (Frontiers in Psychology), 2023.
10. 10.Peer-reviewedCrowe & McLeod — Children's English Consonant Acquisition in the United States: A Review — Peer-reviewed review (AJSLP), 2020.
11. 11.GovernmentWhat You Can Do — Government guidance (StopBullying.gov, last reviewed 2025), 2025.
12. 12.GovernmentSupport the Children Involved — Government guidance (StopBullying.gov, last reviewed 2026), 2026.
13. 13.GovernmentHow to Prevent Bullying — Government guidance (StopBullying.gov, last reviewed 2021), 2021.
14. 14.GovernmentUnderstanding the Roles of Parents and Caregivers in Community-Wide Bullying Prevention Efforts — Government guide (Health Resources and Services Administration, for the StopBullying.gov training module), 2013.
15. 15.GovernmentBullying Awareness and Prevention: Parents — Government education guidance (Department of Defense Education Activity, undated), 2026.
16. 16.ASHASpeech Sound Disorders: Articulation and Phonology — Practice Portal page, Treatment section (undated; accessed 2026), 2026.